Bruce Willis and Emma Heming (Google Image)

9 Reasons Why Dating Older Men Is Awesome

Bruce Willis and Emma Heming (Google Image)
Bruce Willis and Emma Heming (Google Image)

9 Reasons Why Dating Older Men Is Awesome

Written By Stacy

Now if you can get past the fact that you might have started kindergarten when they were in their senior year of high school, dating older men is absolutely amazing.

1.Ownership of pots and pans.
33 yr old: Forget that they could own a house, forget it. When we cook together this amazing thing happens; they have more than one fry pan. AND they own dishes.
26 yr old: He served me breakfast on a paper plate. Twice.

2.Their texts don’t use letters to represent words.
There is nothing sexier than a semi-colon, nothing. I see a semi-colon in text and my skirt is off. Sending me a “u” brings about an iron cage protected by a dragon around my lady parts. Everything just shrivels up and dies, libido went packing, see you later (l8r?).

3. A job.
What’s the term I’m looking for…”security”. And from extensive research, their definition of “networking” isn’t connected to an Xbox.
33 yr old:” I’ve been with my company for 5 years, I know what my responsibilities and I really find something valuable in my job.”
24 yr old: “Give me like 2 years and I’ll be running this bitch.”

4.The word “baby” doesn’t terrify them, as in “baby carrots”.
When I was 20 and my boyfriend was 21, we were once at the grocery store when I stated, “I just love baby carrots, they’re so cute and adorable.” He retorted with “No, no babies ever, I’m a growing boy.” And ran away- in a grocery store, he literally ran away. He literally, fucking ran away.This past Tuesday I was on a date and said something about attending a baby shower and the 33 year old I was with said “Yeah, most of my friends are on their 2nd or 3rd kid”— I was the terrified one. People producing more than one child.

5.A hobby is a real thing, not a weed smoking thing.
26 yr. old: “Every Saturday, I get real baked in the morning and watch a movie like Inception and really think about my life.” (He was also the one who served me breakfast on paper plate.)
33 yr. old: I have never had this conversation with a 33 year old.

6.Helpful input.
They have lived life longer, like 2 extra Olympics sometimes. They have an opinion that is not from the same friend you regularly drink wine with and very possibly might even have reasons.

7.Dating and booty call isn’t confused.
They’re typically in bed before I’m home from the bar on a Tuesday and they think it’s cute. It’s just simple and traditional and I love it.

8.Two words – “Closet Organizer”.

9.A whole new area for humor.
Only when men are older can you discuss how many more Olympics they’ve lived through than you. It’s awesome too because it shows that you know what Math is and ideally how to properly apply mathematical thought. Or you can discuss books and joke about how they were most likely around when the “Great Gatsby” was written.

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