UR LIFE: 5 Questions to Ask When You’ve Lost Motivation

When left to my own devices, I’m a “lazy dreamer”. I dream big and I have great ambition…but something tends to hold me back and keep me lazy. I tell myself I’ll wake up at 5:30a and go to the gym….but when the time comes I’d rather sleep. I tell myself that I’ll type a new blog post…but when the time comes I’d rather watch Netflix. I tell myself I need to mail that letter, but when the time comes I really just don’t feel like it. So what do you do when you’ve lost the motivation to do what you really WANT to do?

5 Questions to Ask When You’ve Lost Motivation:

This is a tricky one because you think it’d be clear cut: my motivation to going to the gym is to achieve some kick-ass muscles! If that’s my motivation, why am I still stuck hitting the snooze button?? Turns out that particular motivational pull isn’t the strongest. If our goals are too vague, or are not “rewarding” enough…we’ve giving ourselves too much wiggle room. Try a goal that’s harder to find excuses for- like a deadline, or reward yourself after you’ve accomplished a goal (lost 5 lbs, went to the gym 3 times this week, wrote your blog post…). Only allow yourself that reward (starbucks, netflix, hanging with friends, new outfit….) WHEN you’ve accomplished your goal.

jessica p2. WHAT’S YOUR EGO DOING?
FullSizeRender-3Keep that ego in check! On average, research shows, it actually takes about 2 MONTHS for a new habit to become automatic. 2 months guys! That being said, it’s going to be a rough two months until you finally formed a better/healthier/nicer habit. SO be nice to yourself. Allow mistakes, but keep going. Don’t give up after a wonky week…or two….or three. Results are not going to be instant- especially if your goal is something more long term (weight loss, a career change…). Beating yourself up is only going to bring you down- which is then going to make it harder for you to achieve your goal. Change is already hard, so why are YOU making it harder??? Stop it!

It’s 5:30a and my alarm is going off- gym time. In that instant all I want to do is go back to sleep. Seriously….but…what happens then? I wake up MUCH later than I planned and now not only do I feel “bleck” because my day has started 2 hours behind, but now I also feel guilty because I didn’t work out. It doesn’t stop there- now that I didn’t work out I feel gross for the rest of the day- AND my ego is ripping me a new one. See how one act of laziness cause so much crankiness??? I know it’s hard. I know it’s a constant struggle- but I promise you’ll feel so much better if you just do it. It will put you in a much better mindset if you know you ARE making steps towards your goal.

Any change that you’re going to make has to be done for YOURSELF, no one else. People may try to pressure you into things but they can only be motivators for so long- they’re not going to be the ones waking you up early to go work out. They will not be the ones pushing you to finish your blog posts. They won’t be cheering you on when you’re stalking Jared Leto. That’s all YOU. Make sure this goal is actually something you want for yourself, because in the long run you are your best cheerleader. You are going to have to motivate yourself. Your own desire will always outweigh someone else’s dream for you.
I think abs are really awesome, and they’d be great to have, sure. But do I really REALLY want them? ….eh. At the end of the day I just want to be happy with my body- abs or not. Having abs requires SO MUCH dedication, and let’s be real- I love pizza. So as you can see, why I thought abs might be something I want… the “might” is setting me up for failure. Find something you truly, honestly, and fully want- because I’ll tell you right now that it’s going to be hard to accomplish your goal. Anything worth having takes work so you NEED to want it. Your “want” is going to be where your “motivation” comes from- so make sure that “want” is so strong that all it does it set you up for success- not failure!

Like I’ve said above, it’s not going to be easy. It’s rough, it’s tough and sleeping-in is so alluring. You got this! You can make the change! If you’re ever doubting yourself or find you’ve caught the “lazies” go back and read this post agin! Answer these questions and make sure your motivation is aligned with your want. You can do it.

Know someone else who’s struggling? Share this post with them! Help them through THEIR lazies.


Jessica is in no way an expect on dating advice, but she always seems to collect great stories. When she’s not venting about her dating experiences on her blog (jessicaprell.com), she’s acting, singing, or frantically trying to train her dog, Django. She enjoys boba milk tea, sarcastic hashtags, and a great face mask. It would make her happy if someone other than her mother followed her on twitter- so please follow her @jessicaprell

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